There comes a point where the time passed becomes bigger than what the heart can bear. Three years housebound was too much for me; too heavy to acknowledge, too much time to think about. So I let it passed unnoticed, hoping in some way it might make it easier for me, and in some ways it did help; not allowing the number three to define me or to take up all my focus. But I realise now I also passed up an opportunity for reflection and growth. A time to see the gained rather than the lost, the gratitude rather than the mourning. To make a list of everything these three years have given me, and to imagine who I’d be if these three years hadn’t happened to me.
Because whenever I find myself feeling sad about the time passed, I know that this is the moment I need to contemplate what my life would have been like if these three years hadn’t happened. To take away everything I have learnt; the knowledge, the wisdom, the growth. Because I know when I do this it doesn’t take long before I remember that no amount of time can replace what I have gained in these three years.
But above everything, I wouldn’t have this: I wouldn’t have people reading my words, I wouldn’t have made the endless friendships with so many incredible people, I wouldn’t have this deep connection with an entire community, I wouldn’t have people who constantly support me, inspire me, and bring me endless love, joy, and connection every single day.
So even though I’m slightly late to my three years housebound anniversary, I want to dedicate this moment to every one of you reading this. I wouldn’t be half the person I am today without you. And I know I will treasure the friendships I have made these past three years forever. Thank you for being on this journey with me 💛💛💛